Episode 6: Bugs & Drugs

[intro]

This is The Michael Christopher Program. Episode six.

On last week's episode, I had a lot of help from my brother Nathan, but he's not here this week, so I'll have to do it on my own.

[Cicada sounds]

And now, the Entomology Moment.

[Entomology Moment theme]

I was walking by a tree in my backyard when I noticed a bug shell clinging to the bark.

It was a Cicada.

It just flew away leaving its shell behind like so much garbage.

Quite literally a litterbug.


[musical interlude]


Comedy Spotlight.

[Comedy Spotlight theme]

Get ready to laugh at Chris Michaels.


[laughter]

I was watching TV... as I often do.

[light laughter]

When I saw an ad for Lipitor.

What the ----? I'm not a doctor.

[laughter]

How many doctors are watching The Price Is Right?

[laughter]

When I was a kid, you got sick, you went to the doctor, and they figured out what was wrong with you.

[laughter]

Back then, there were no ads for Nexium, Plavix, Singulair, Advair... what are some other ones?

Audience Member: Valtrex.

Valtrex, yeah.

[laughter]

Audience Member: Crestor.

Crestor.

What I wanna know is why is my head filled with all this information about drugs for diseases I'll probably never get?

[laughter]

Heckler: You suck!

Yeah, pipe down mister.

[laughter]

Heckler: Get off the stage! You suck!

Oh yeah? I do? Well there's a 2 drink minimum here, and it looks like you've only had 1 1/2.

[finger snap]

Security!

[finger snap]

Get 'em.

Heckler: Hey! Let go of me! Come on...

[laughter]


Nothing like an open mic to bring out the crazies.

[Comedy Spotlight theme]


And now, to waste time, I'm going to press every button on this drum machine.

[various drum machine sounds]


And that's all the time we have for this week.

Goodbye everybody.


[outro]